5 Top Secrets of a Successful Marriage

Although today it seems that the divorce rate is soaring high, we can still witness uncountable successful marriages. People have been happily married in the past and will remain so in the future. They have shared their life experiences on many matrimonial sites. So let's discover the recipe of success. Enter the institution of marriage with the right attitude Life is not a bed of roses. Everybody gets his due share of hardships. The difference lies in the way people deal with these hardships. You just have to know that it is not always going to be an easy journey. The two of you have to stick to each other through the evens and odds of life. Divorce is not an option In the West, most people end up getting a divorce because they just don't want to find a solution to their problems. Maybe they are too caught up in other things or maybe they need an easy way out of the mess. People who stay hitched for decades tell us that divorce was never an option for them. They had to work out their problems so that they could live with peace of mind. Developing a tolerating attitude Two people living under the same roof does not sound like the perfect plan. These people would be prone to mood swings, annoying attitude, personality clashes and differing habits. To live happily for a real long time would require the husband and wife to adapt a tolerating attitude towards each other. You might not agree to what they say or believe, but you would just need to agree 'to disagree' without creating much fuss over it! Respecting the other person Love without respect is not possible. The people tied in a marriage need to respect everything related to their spouse. You should respect them for their beliefs, for what they do and for who they are. It is important to respect the family of your partner as well. You would be immensely appreciated for it! Say it all Unexpressed feelings and unsaid words often become the seed to failing relationships. You might save the moment by not saying what you feel but you are sowing seeds for disaster. It is important to clear the matters and never let any misunderstanding destroy your relationship. This strategy stays true when it comes to appreciating and praising your partner. Let them know how proud they make you. Try it, it works miracles! Making a successful marriage is not easy but it is certainly not impossible! Muslim Matrimonial principles make the married life even easier! With Naseeb.com blog you can read all information related to marriage. Naseeb.com is one of best matrimonial sites of the world and are helping in finding the right partner for your life.

How to Make a Good Marriage Better

You know what they say if something is moving along without any major hurdles - 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it.' But your marriage may not yet have reached its full potential. Believe it or not, you can change boring routines and improve your relationship. According to the field of interpersonal neurobiology, our brains are constantly changing. And that is impacted by how we interact daily. Loving relationships can alter the brain circuits that shape memories and emotions. Think about the immediate attraction when you first fell in love. This alchemy continues throughout life, and how we treat each other matters. In a loving relationship we can change neural functions when we decide to be more compassionate. And holding hands is enough to reduce stress and minimize physical pain. So whether you want to release euphoria-inducing chemicals like dopamine or change the wiring in your brain, here are some ideas to consider: Invest emotionally. Make time for each other and keep romance alive. A gentle touch or quick hug releases oxytocin, a hormone that facilitates bonding. When you're tense, an affectionate moment can help you feel relaxed and more loved. Studies show that celebrating positive events predict greater relationship satisfaction than complaining about negative ones. Just like with any valuable asset, the efforts you make will be returned in multiples. Eliminate boredom. Lightheartedness is often a casualty of hectic family life and then, when the kids leave home, there's an even greater void. Talk to your partner about this without being critical. Plan adventures and discover activities you both enjoy. Take on a physical challenge together and train to make it happen. Have fun and laugh - being playful can lead to greater intimacy. Ask for what you need. No one is a mind reader. Sometimes couples can get frustrated and stop talking. Try to understand each other's disappointment or resentment. Meet halfway and get more of what you want.If you invest in your own happiness, your partner won't have to be responsible for your wellbeing. By taking action, you'll feel more confident and your relationship will reap the dividends. Express gratitude often. Compliments serve as positive reinforcement at the very times when you may be taking each other for granted. If you feel distant, try to see your partner in a different light. Look for the qualities you love about each other. And when you're having positive thoughts, say them out loud. Being satisfied with small changes can make a good marriage better. (C) Her Mentor Center, 2012 Phyllis Goldberg, Ph.D. is a consultant in family dynamics. Whether you're coping with marital stress, acting out teens, aging parents, boomerang kids or difficult daughters-in-law, she has solutions. Visit our website, http://www.HerMentorCenter.com to discover practical tips for dealing with parents growing older & kids growing up. Sign up there for our free newsletter, Stepping Stones and download our complimentary ebooks, "Courage and Lessons Learned: Reaching Your Goals" and "Taking Control of Stress in a Financial Storm." A

10 Tips for the Traveling Husband to Keep His Marriage Vibrant


If you travel for work a lot, you basically live in two separate lives - one is hotel rooms and one is your home. When you return from a trip, you want to be appreciated; you want to feel your family has missed you and are glad you are back. You want to feel you still count as head man in the family. Yet, that often is not what happens. The kids and wife have learned to live without you. Many men say they call home regularly, even every day, but these calls may feel more routine or mandatory. Your wife complains about the kids or problems at home; you tell her information about your business and people she may not even know. The calls are not be satisfying; you don't feel she really cares what you have to say. They don't leave each of you with that loving, fun, special spark that brought you together in the first place. It doesn't have to be that way if you are willing to be creative and go beyond your typical routines. Yet, the rewards of doing just that may make it well worthwhile. Here are 10 tips that will keep you very present in your home life while still traveling in your work world. 1. Telephone calls home need to be more useful and personal. Not only should you ask about what is happening at home and talk about your work and meetings, but share something personal about yourself. Your wife will feel more connected to you when you are speaking about yourself not your work. Ask more personal things about her, not just problems and kid-stuff. 2. Make sure some of your calls are loving, something more than a quick, "I love you," as you hang up. Speak about what you miss or love about her. 3. Make sure some of your calls are sensual - not just sexy. Giving explicit details of what you'd like to do with her is not the same as talking about how much you miss touching her soft skin, kissing her, enjoying her twinkly eyes. 4. Every day or two, send her an email or text with loving thoughts. They don't have to be long. Even a quick "I love you and miss you." Or, "Can't wait to see your smiling face," Or, "This city is so lovely, I long to share it with you someday." 5. Before you leave, hide funny or loving notes in different places that she will find. It might be inside one of her shoes, under her slips, etc. 6. Leave her with a treasure hunt. Each day you text her clue where to find something special from you. They could be little notes or small gifts that are funny or special. It is best if they are not expensive or big ones. That way she'll not feel you are buying her acceptance of your traveling. She'll know you are doing this because it helps you think about her every day. 7. Write a continuing story; each day you alternate writing a paragraph. Even though you are busy all day, you can always find 5 or 10 minutes before collapsing into bed to do this. 8. Play chess or checkers by computer or phone or email, where you each make one move a day. Again, you can always find 5 or 10 minutes before collapsing into bed to do this. 9. Leave funny or loving messages on the phone when you know she will not be there. 10. Take turns having a joke or story for each other on alternate nights. Dr. Karen Gail Lewis has been a relationship therapist for 42 years, practicing in Cincinnati and Washington, DC area. To learn more about relationships from her, including articles and free videos, go to http://www.SecretsToASolidRelationship.com

What Is A Christian Marriage?


There is probably no event as ripe with promise and expectation as a wedding. Unfortunately, expectations of marriage are often the cause of early problems and sometimes, divorce. In this article, we'll examine what it means to have a Christian marriage, a marriage in the image of God, a marriage of three rather than two, and how the two become one. If you're not yet married or if you've been married ten years, be ready for some surprises. Marriage In The Image Of God: We know it isn't our beauty, our sinless life or unselfish nature, so what could it mean that man and woman were created in the image of God? In my understanding, God is three persons (Father, Son, Holy Spirit) who are one eternal God. Anyone who has tried to maintain a relationship for longer than a few days can easily see how big a miracle this is. The Three have been One for eternity. All we have to manage is 50-60 years. This is one of the main ways we humans were created in the image of God...to live in relationship. The relationship that bears most closely to the image of God, is the permanent, loving, committed relationship of marriage. Two Becoming One: Anyone attending a Christian wedding knows that the Christian concept of marriage is two becoming one. Most people don't know what that means in real life. Of course, on the wedding day, there's the spiritual union and the physical union which often brings little ones. However, the union most discussed in the Bible is the union of wills, desires, expectations. It's a process that takes a lifetime, so we'll take a little time to examine it here. People get married for entirely selfish reasons...what the other person has done or can do for them (for example-attention, fulfillment, children, sex, food, house, family, etc.). Many of these expectations are not negotiated or even discussed prior to marriage because neither party is aware of them. That's because these expectations were just what they'd seen of marriage growing up, from TV, neighbors, family, etc. Every person has different expectations. Once the rings go on, all bets are off...the expectations reveal themselves and the conflict begins. What a wonderful system, right? Believe it or not, no matter how difficult it seems, God does have a plan to handle this. His plan is called self-sacrifice. You can see self-sacrifice in Philippians 2, where He tells Christians to consider the needs of others as more important than their own. You can see it in Eph 5, where He says for you to submit to one another out of love for Christ, and to sacrifice yourself for your spouse. In fact, you can read everything the Bible has to say about marriage and never see where your spouse is supposed to meet your expectations. By sacrificing what you want and devoting yourself to what your spouse wants and needs, you set an entirely different environment for the marriage relationship. Look at Php 2 again. Jesus, to serve the needs of the relationship, gave up His equal status with God, became human, allowed us to kill Him, and thereby got all His needs and wants met. Do you think He wanted to do this? In the garden, He prayed, 'Father, if there's any way, save me from this fate, nevertheless, not my will but yours, be done.' Now, this is a hard example to follow, but it's in the self-sacrifice of love, that we're created in God's image. If two people are going to become one new person, some parts are going to have to come off. This is a painful process. Each of you is going to sacrifice about half of the self you were when you got married. When you have to sacrifice, it will not seem fair any more than the sacrifice Jesus made was fair to Him. If you're patient and willing to give even when it seems your spouse isn't giving, then you'll see the blessings of marriage you could never have imagined, the miracle of two becoming one in everything. It will no longer be a sacrifice, but a great joy. To get to that point requires faith in the promises of God and of your spouse. Many fall on the road, never to see the promised land of Christian marriage. Marriage Of Three-Not Two: They fall because most people, even most Christians believe there is no difference between a Christian marriage and any other, but the difference is so profound, it could mean the difference between life-long loving marriage and divorce. In society at large, marriage is a contract between two people which can be dissolved at any time. In Christianity, marriage is between three people and only one of them can dissolve it. Yes, three people (husband, wife and God) are part of everything in a Christian marriage (love, children, sex, arguments, budget...everything). Not only that, but God is the only one who has authority to break the marriage up (see Christian Divorce Doctrine). A marriage of three is very different. As each of you gets closer to Christ, you get closer to each other. Instead of arguing, you seek God's answer to the issues. You manage the family money according to God's principles. It takes the pressure off of each individual, because Jesus is there to provide His advice and His power to solve problems. "A triple braided cord is hard to break." Just like the Trinity, a marriage grounded in Christ is 3-in-one. Christian marriage is very different from any marriage, anywhere else. It's two people, each sacrificing to serve the other and become one whole person instead of two selfish fractions. Christian marriage is the image of God's relationship with Himself. From that relationship, anything is possible. Glen Williams is Webmaster for Web-Church Christian Worship Online, an Ordained Minister, Founder of E-Home Fellowship (EHF), Co. He has been active in ministry since 1989. You can comment on his articles at Web-Church Christian Forums. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Glen_D._Williams

Do You Need a Marriage Miracle?


Are you looking for a miracle in your marriage? If so, you are not alone. Seven out of ten couples need some form of professional help, at some point in their marriage. Sadly, most of us never reach out and get the help we need for four reasons: 1. We feel our situation is hopeless. When you have gone for years either fighting constantly, or maybe even suffering in silence, it is easy to become so discouraged that you feel there is no help for you, but what you need to understand is that with God there are no hopeless circumstances. You just need some professional guidance and a plan. 2. We feel that being a Christian somehow exempts us from marital problems. Christians are human too. Having marital problems is not a sign of weakness, or lack of faith. I tell people that if they had a broken bone they would get the help they need, so why not for a broken marriage. Being a Christian does not mean that we do not have problems. IT just means that God walks with us through them. 3. We are too embarrassed to get the help we need. I know from experience how frustrating this can be. When my husband and I were having problems, the last thing I wanted to do was be seen going into a counselor's office. I felt bad enough without having to worry that someone was going to find out. The good news is that thanks to eBooks', and online programs we don't have to go any farther than our own living room, so that should not a problem any longer. There are a lot of wonderful resources out there; however, you must be very careful when choosing a program, because, everyone who claims to go by Christian principles, and line up with the Word of God does not always do so. 4. Counseling is too expensive. This can be a real problem especially with the economy in the shape that it is in, and the fact that one counseling session can cost Upwards of $150.00. This again is another good reason to find a good program online that fits your needs. Most all online programs will be under $100.00, plus you will have the convenience, and privacy of your on home, and can read or watch them when you want to. It is a true but staggering fact that divorce among Christians has now surpassed their non-Christian counterparts, and has become epidemic. But now that you have all the information you need to move forward, don't let another day go by without getting the help your marriage needs. You deserve to have the strong and loving marriage that God intended. Remember, you cannot continue to do the same thing year after year and expect a different outcome. Let this be the best year your marriage has ever seen! Rebecca Holland has been a Christian for over 18 years. She and her husband Charlie have seen their marriage go from hopeless to happiness thanks to a wonderful program they found. For more information on the marriage program they recommend "How to save your Christian marriage even if only you and God want it" go to http://hankieblessings.com and click on Relationship helps. You will be glad you did.